I have been waiting for you.

I know why you are here and I believe I can help you. Though you may not realize it yet, you are here because it is exactly where you are supposed to be. The emptiness inside you leaves you unsettled, I know because I can feel it too. You hate how comfortable you've become, I did too. I am not a surgeon, I can't just fix it and make it go away. That's for you to do. I am a poet and I am a revolutionary. I'll scatter these words across the page in hopes that you'll find them and hear exactly what you need to hear. I will leave them here because I desire you. I desire your presence.

I can see you have fortified yourself tight. Your walls are high and their mortar is thick. Sometimes I too just need to step away off to isolation. Even now as my callused fingers press against the silver alphabetic boxes, I am painting this canvas alone but I cannot seem to escape you. You are always on mind, and why? I never requested you, never have I asked to be so drawn to you. I am haunted by you and haunted by what you have inside of you; for what reason? I need you, but here and now it doesn't matter because we are not ready to be together. Not yet. The others can never understand, they have abandoned the things that they loved most, but I believe we still have hope. Time is short.

I suppose if I am true to myself, this art was never just for me. It never could be. If it were, I wouldn't be plagued by the notion of rejection for the things i've created. I should start off by saying that if you find I carry no merit you should leave now and perhaps for the best. If my heart is not truly where I say it is, I am disillusioned and lost and i will certainly take you with me. But if you study me close, using discernment, maybe you'll become overwhelmed with hope. If you can find hope in the things that I am saying, maybe, just maybe, my vision of community can exist and you can be apart of it.

So I begin here with this preface, I want you to understand who I am and why I stand. I am willing to share myself, and all this with you. I am not seeking glory, and I don't need their fame. I fight this pain in my bones and this nausea in my stomach that the vulnerability brings for you, and you alone. If you can read what I share, all I ask is that you respect it. I want to know you too, if you'll have me, and I promise you will always have my respect.


This is my journey to becoming an artist I hope you'll join me.